Don’t ask me why I obsessively look to rock ’n’ roll bands for some kind of model for a better society. I guess it’s just that I glimpsed something beautiful in a flashbulb moment once, and perhaps mistaking it for prophecy have been seeking its fulfillment ever since.
- Lester Bangs
What you did was wicked, hurtful, immoral, and wrong, and possibly psychotically insane. I will NEVER trust you again as long as I live. I see through your veil of wicked deceit and I am too strong now to be caught in your traps of insanity and corruption. You say one thing, but you go do another. You act like the rules don’t apply to you. And yet you hold your head up high. You go around acting like a superstar, you go around acting like you’re the best, meanwhile you’re lying and using people and fucking up people’s lives left and right. I will have no part in your diabolical little play, I refuse to be a pawn in your cruel games. You think you’re a superstar, yet, you’re not and you need to wake up to all the damage you’re doing, to yourself and to everyone around you. Your evil lies and diabolical dealings will catch up with you. I am a survivor! I've seen it all now, my vision is clear and I am pure. No more lies can string me along. I have my integrety back. I am strong. Too strong to be pulled back into your swirling whirlpools of wicked deception, your evil snakepit of slithering serpents. You can't hurt me anymore. I never ever think about you anymore. NEVER!!!!!! And that fact kills you, deep inside your sole, because you think everything is about you and you need to be worshipped and you need to feel like a mighty King of Power. Well you are wrong. Dead wrong. Your heart is cold as ice and black as coal. You act all high and mighty, and you hold your head up high, yet in the true reality you are NOTHING. You call me unbalanced? HAHAHAHAHAHA. I was the best thing that ever happened to you and you took my heart and broke it into a million pieces with your hammer of betrayal. You ruin everyone's life around you. You act clean, yet you are as clean as a bathroom cookie! I have transended the filthy lies and evil immoralities of your disgusting and revolting betrayals. The years of self-deception are done. Ten years. Ten fucking years. Do you hold you head up high when you do those evil acts? Does it eat at you, in the night, knowing that your whole rotten life is focused on deception and hurting those around you, and you still go strutting your stuff like some sort of superstar? Your whole life is blaming, shaming, gaming, and claiming. The day you stand in front of your maker and be judged for your actions, I wonder if you will finally for once come to regret the unspeakable and forbidden sins you have unleashed around you in your psychotic insanity. You have unleashed countless horrors on all those around you, and yet you still prance around like a superstar. I have my integrety intact, you do not no matter how many times you try and tell yourself. I am strong and I have moved on. Can you hold your head up high? You can't go on living the dirty, filthy lies you do. Your evil sins and wicked webs are going to catch up with you, someday, and you will have a consience. A consience is the greatest curse I can wish upon you. And on that day you will cry out in the night and your bloodcurdling scream will be heard by God above. I pray that someday you will wake up from the nightmare you inflict on those around you and you will shake your fist at the sky in angry vengeance of shame guilt and sorrow.
******
Wow. So much dramatic hyperbole...I can totally imagine the steam coming out of the ears of the person who wrote this. If you are keeping score at home, there are 2 "psychotically insanes", 2 "wickeds" and 3 "evils"in this rant.
I have NO Thanksgiving preparations to make. Which is awesome. I just show up, eat, talk, then sleep. So tonight I am just going to catch up with some old friends who are in town for the holidays and right now I am just relaxing and listening to music. While I was 'Hold On Magnolia' came on and I realized how much I love Jason Molina, in all his forms(Songs:Ohia, Magnolia Electric Co), and since it is Thanksgiving Eve, I thought I would give thanks in blog from. So thanks Mr. Molina, your songs, 'Hold On Magnolia' and 'Leave This City' especially have been therapy to me on more than one occasion. Songs: Ohia - 'Hold On Magnolia' MP3
I have to admit, I am not feeling especially compulsive this year...not feeling the need to list things songs and albums and the like, I just don't think I have the energy for it this year.
So...I just wanted to give an official blog 'Album Of The Year' award to The Hold Steady for 'Stay Positive'....shocking, I know! They have my heart, what can I say. Even in this year of amazing music, it was their new record that I listened to the most...without a doubt. Craig Finn's words bounce around inside my head at all hours of the day. I really don't know how I would have made it through the last five years without these Hold Steady songs...and that is not at all an overstatement.
As for the rest of the year...it was awesome! Here are 15 of my favorite tracks from the past year...in no particular order...just click the link:
As we locked eyes last night I became coated in a heavy layer of sadness. Through my own self driven fantasies I had come to believe you were the grail at the end of my lifelong quest for happiness. Yet as I stood there I realized your heart really belongs to someone else. And while he may have shattered it, you would rather it lay there in pieces on the ground, never to be touched by another man. So much for my delusion of mending it and keeping it for my own. Therefore this ocean of feelings that flows deep inside me will remain there - buried and hidden from you and the world. For you nothing will change, as never having the knowledge that I felt anything means ingorance that it isn't there. I will slink back into the shadows of your life, cheering and applauding you every step of the way. In time I hope the waves I hear roaring inside me right now will dissipate into a pitter patter, barely noticeable to me and easily dismissed. I am here as always, your friend and nothing more.
******
Saddest. Missed connection. Ever.
Seriously...this reminds me of some scene in some movie wherein the guy has to go and watch his best friend, who he has secretly been in love with for like 10 years, marry some other guy(wasn't that sort of the plot to 'My Best Friend's Wedding'? I digress)...which in turn always reminds me of this song about an ex-love's impending wedding. Jude - 'I Do' MP3
I was the 20 something guy holding two bottles of chardonay in the condom section of the Dominick's. You were the lovely lady in her 50's peering over my shoulder as I made my selection. I was not aware of your presence until the audible gasp when I reached for a box of ribbed magnums. My date did not go exactly as planned; the wine went down ok but I forgot to use the magnums in the heat of the moment and I think I may have gotten the clap. Long story short I still have a dozen condoms left over if you are interested in going out sometime...
'Liejacker' is the beautiful new album from British singer songwriter Thea Gilmore. She is so, so talented...I stumbled across her a few years ago totally out of the blue when I found a great version of the Buzzcocks classic 'Ever Fall In Love.' I'll post that track too.
Here is a new tune from this record, and the aforementioned cover....great songs both. Thea Gilmore - 'Old Soul' MP3
This as close to holiday music as you will get on my blog! ' I love this song, it borrows beautifully from my favorite Otis Redding song...just a beautiful tune.
Hello world. I am having a hard time of it. I dont have a car, a place stable to stay or a job right now and Im wanted, but I want to be in love too. I am very attractive and I have other talents that alot of men dont, on top of an innate intelligence. I just need to be honest about my situation at the moment because my life is teetering on the edge of destruction if I dont figure out something quickly. I doubt youll be interested, but sometimes when you know the bad from the outset, youre better off than you are when everything about a person seems great. Leave me a message please. Thanks.
******
Ladies of the internet...I can practically hear your collective swoon as I type this. (Thank you CP for finding and forwarding this one...great find!)
It sounds to me like Ben Kweller is doing his best to commune with his inner Gram Parsons on his forthcoming 'Changing Horses' record...and I am more than OK with that.
This is the second track that I was lucky enough to have sent to me this morning(thanks again Carly)...and just like before, the second I played it I surfed right over here to post in on my blog. Love at first listen.
Daniel Martin Moore will probably be the only Sub Pop artist ever to call Cold Spring, Kentucky home. At least I would imagine that to be the case. What is for certain, is that I love his brand of folk. He has an amazing way of turning a phrase...I can't wait to get my ears on the rest of his record, 'Stray Age'
Thanks to my friend Carly for hipping me to this artist. She sent me this song via email this morning and I have been listening to it(along with the next one I will post) all day...great stuff.
Larkin Grimm is a Memphis born singer/songwriter now living in Providence,RI. She used to be in the band Dirty Projectors, before taking off to do her own thing. This is the only song of hers that I have heard, but I will be remedying that VERY quickly...I love this track.
I think I am going to make this a new feature here on CS. I have to kill 40hrs a week...sometimes you have to get creative. The premise is simple, I share with you one AWESOME Nickelback lyric a week(pure poetry, I assure you) and then play an actually awesome song to knock the Nickelback right out of your system.
*****
“She ain’t no Cinderella when she gettin’ undressed/’Cause she rocks it like the naughty Wicked Witch of the West"
OK, so yesterday I posted a song from Crooked Still's 2006 release, 'Shaken By A Low Sound', and last night I made a point to stop by one of the last real record stores in town(remember how much fun buying records used to be?) and picked up their brand new set of songs, the brilliantly titled 'Still Crooked.'
Since the last album came out, the band has lost a cello player(boo!) and gained a fiddle player(yay!). But the overall spirit of the band and their beautiful collective sound is still very much in place. I think I could listen to vocalist Aoife O'Donnovan(she is also in the band Wayfaring Strangers) sing just about anything and be more than content for hours on end.
Here is one of my favorites from the new record, a beautiful song...
Gomez's debut record, 'Bring It On', was recently re-released in a new a 10yr anniversary edition. To this day, I still may have to put this album in my all time top 10 list. I still remember where I was the first time I heard it. I became great friends with a German exchange student my senior year in high school, and we got into the habit(one that I am sad to say we grew out of) of making each other mix cd's and mailing them back and forth, over the Atlantic. This was in the early days of the world wide web, mind you...so Napster wasn't HUGE yet and it was a lot harder to discover new stuff than it is now. Anyway, I was sitting in my tiny closet of an apartment on Norwich Avenue when the package came. One CD was a random mix, the other was a burnt copy of Gomez's 'Bring It On.'
I knew that Tobias must have really loved this band to send me the whole album. I put it in immediately, and I was blown away. Those voices. Those songs. They didn't sound like ANY British band I had ever heard before...sure, there are hints of the Beatles in there, the best parts, but it was strikingly original. It was most definitely love at first listen. And although I have followed the band since, they have never come close to mesmerizing me with the sonic gold that was on that first record.
So, I just wanted to get my official love of this record up in blog form...and say thanks to Gomez the hours of unadulterated, pure pleasure that "Bring It On' has brought me.
The image of your face when I slapped you (left-handed,too, because my drink was in my right), is one I won't soon forget.
My friend had gone to the bathroom, so when I felt a hand grab and slightly grope my ass, I had no reason to suspect that it was her who felt me up, rather than you, the innocent bystander.
I quickly turned over my shoulder and gave you a quizzical look, which you must have interpreted as come-hither, because you winked and gave me a knowing nod. Taking this as acknowledgment of "your" action, I slapped you. Hard.
This was the first time I had ever slapped anyone, and I immediately felt empowered and fully justified, having not relied on my boyfriend to stand up for my fragile female ego. Yay, feminism! This quickly turned to shock however, as I looked over at my friend, doubled over, red in the face and gasping for breath from laughing hysterically. Immediately putting two and two together, I turned to you, still standing with a very bewildered and increasingly angry look on your face. "Ohmygod, I'm so sorry-she..I.. I thought...", I struggled to apologize. "Get away from me, I don't know what's going on, get away you crazy bitch"... and then you backed up and ran away.
I probably would have done the same thing, so I don't blame you for running away. I wanted to chase you and explain, but thought better of it for several reasons. I can only imagine the stories the next morning as your buddies rehashed the situation, still wondering why a random girl slapped you for no reason. At least now you (hopefully) know the reason.
I'm still sorry. Let me know, and I'll buy you a drink, at a safe distance, so you can be sure no violence will occur. I promise.
Sincerely,
The crazy girl who (somewhat accidently) slapped you across the face
This is why I never turn the TV on. Because when I do, the very first thing I see is this commercial. Yes, the Barak Obama commemorative plate - the hallmark of class.
If you had told me when I was 18 that in fifteen years I'd be listening to MULTIPLE bands that incorporate the use of a banjo into their sound, I would have laughed at you.
Fast forward to 2008 and here I sit, loving all of these new bluegrass, or alt-grass, revival bands...the stuff is just good for the soul. Lately, I have been devouring a band from Boston called Crooked Still. They have a brand new record out called, beautifully, 'Still Crooked' which I haven't picked up yet. But I still wanted to pass a couple of songs along...here is one of my favorites off of their 'Shaken By A Low Sound' album, which came out in 2006. Oh, and they do a cool version of the American folk classic 'Little Sadie'...which reminded me how much I love the Mark Lanegan version, so I will throw that up too. Enjoy. Crooked Still - 'Can't You Hear Me Callin?' MP3
I may just have the perfect Dream for you. Not typical at all. Take your mind away on a fantasy all your own.
I learned massage in St Louis and Cincinnati. There I did not learn the erotic massage but not long after massaging professionally I found that most women want more. However working professionally that is not possible if I want to hold a job. So I developed the art of erotic massage through research and practice. It goes very well with a full body massage. It is truly amazing.
Casual private and Discrete, that's me. Here is how casual - I can come to your room or home and give you a "full body erotic massage" leaving you completely satisfied and relaxed. You will love it. My intension is to see you experience complete physical pleasure from head to toe.
I can even show up, not say a word, give you that total massage including an orgasm if you like and be on my way. You just let me know what you would prefer. This is especially nice for the ladies who have never experienced an orgasm. My full body erotic massage comes with an orgasm guaranteed.
A full body massage relaxes you first, it can be so relaxing it can put you to sleep and ten minutes later you feel totally rejuvenated. The reason for that is your blood circulation is greatly increased in areas massaged. While at the relaxed state where sexual arousal is introduced it is very stimulating. If you prefer, there will be no insertions of any kind. No need to tell me what feels good to you, I know what feels good. The thing is you have no need to perform for anyone. This massage is for you alone. You can even put on your headphones listen to some nice music close your eyes and imagine what where or whom ever you like.
******
Just a quick public service announcement - it would probably be a good idea to steer clear of guys who are offering their masseuse services on craigslist. He cleverly leaves out the part of the experience in which you are cut up into like 50 pieces and buried underneath his mom's basement.
Sometimes I feel like I need to treat this blog as some sort of time capsule. I just want to randomly post some of the songs from my formative years...so they don't go gently into the good night.
I guess that is the only reason for this post. Future generations need to hear the unbridled angst of Polly Jean Harvey...
"Hold on to 16 as long as you can..." one of the most poignant rock lyrics ever put to paper.
My oldest nephew is turning 16 next month(what? God, I swear he was born like...last year!)...I feel like having some sort of intervention with him. I feel like sitting him down and playing this song for him and telling him to follow every dream he has while he is young...because those dreams become harder and harder to realize with each passing year - says the wise old uncle.
The only reason I thought about this song today is because I heard 'So Sublime' from Beth Rowley on my commute this morning. It struck me as having that same sort of subject matter...the every frightening rate of which the years are flying by. So I thought I would just post them both, since they seem to be cosmic soul mates in song...in my head anyway.
Postings like this are what 'Certain Songs' are all about. I hear it...I like it...I feel olbigated to share it. The mystery here is where in the world did I get this track from? Some random compilation I guess...it popped up via the shuffle mode and here we are. The mysteries of my music collection will never cease...
Do you like to PvP in the World of Warcraft? Do you want to have sex with a girl playing arena in the eighteen-hundreds bracket? Do you want to have sex with me WHILE I play arena? Continue reading..
I will be playing my druid.. she is in full Season 3 and some Season 4. I play with another female player on her warrior, but she is not going to physically join us.. she will be on vent or skype listening in, but mostly her purpose will be to keep the game going smoothly by letting me know what is happening so I don't have to pay much attention.
You must be ok with vaginal and anal penetration, as well as eating me out, and you must be able to finish on me twice within one hour.
But more importantly, you must be familiar with the game. You should be not only yelling things like, "Your pussy feels so good on my dick" but also pay some attention to my arena game(s). And be loud. Remember, I'll have my headset on to talk to my partner. "Root him!", "Cyclone so I can pull out and fuck your ass" and so on. You must be kinky, naughty, and very horny. I will be quizzing you, so if you are not sure about your stuff, please do not respond.
What you have to do/have in order for me to consider you:
- You must have at least one level 70 in equivalent gear, maybe we can chat about it. - You cannot be overweight, but also not the muscle jock body type with a brain the size of a pea. Chubby is BEST! - You must be able to spell. - You must be at least 20 years old and no older than 29. - At least 5'10". - No blondies. - Dark hair, dark eyes - Prefer uncut, but you must be clean. Circumsized will be considered, but not preferred.
About me:
- I am 5'8" - 150lbs - Blue eyes and brown hair. - I know a lot about video games. - I want to fuck you while I play arena if you fulfill the above requirements. - I am very tight.. I have not had sex in about 8 months.
I'm a juggalo recently shipped in from the ok. i'm tryin to find me a down ass to spend my nights wit. i'm a bit of a round boy but not too bad. hair will soon be blue once again due to not being able to keep it during oklahoma living. i like my girls skinny and on the freaky side. tattoos metal and different colored hair all possitives. loves of them itty bitty titty girls. gotta be able to sing psy songs with me. i'm a heavy equipment operator. don't drink don't smoke and no kids. my homies are my family. so if ya think yous the girl for me hit me up. if not then straight up fuck the fuck off.
******
Aw...Insane Clown Posse fans are just THE most romantic...
Tomorrow, on his birthday no less, my great friend Henry Toft(his rock star alter ego is Me And The Horse I Rode In On) is getting to play as the opening act to one of his favorite musicians, Damien Jurado. I can't imagine a better birthday present...Good luck man, I know you will rock the house with your gorgeously sullen acoustic folk rock...no sleep til Copenhagen!!!
'Oh, The Places We'll Go' is the brand new album from Olympia, WA's Lake. It's a really, really good indie pop record, the band's third release. Beautiful harmonies and smart lyrics abound. It's a little sugary sweek at times, but with just nine tracks it never gets to be too much...here is a tune so you can give it a spin for yourself...enjoy.
Finding this Jens Lekman cover over the weekend made my day(I know, I am easily amused). 'A Little Lost' is one of my favorite songs, so simple and poignant. Arthur Russell is a sadly overlooked songwriter in this blogger's humble opinion...and I am a self-confessed lover of all things Lekman. So without further ado, enjoy these two versions of a great song: Arther Russell - 'A Little Lost' MP3
I hate that you can act so nonchalant about things now. I'm not sure if its an act or really how you feel about everything that happened, like it doesn't really matter at this point. It's been so long since ive seen you but i know if i did it would be as if nothing had changed...for me anyway. thats how comfortable you make me feel. Even if I dont see you again or get the oppertunity to apologize for not realizing what we could have been and a lot of other things, my feelings for you wont change. Theres SOOO much you don't know. I just want you to know that youll always be my person. the guy i compare all other guys to. you set the standard high and will always have a little piece of my heart.
*i hope you always remember sunsets, our drives and the way you kissed me because i will never forget. I hope you find this...
re: i miss you. read this baby! its been over 2 years... - m4w - 999
"I hate that you can act so nonchalant about things now. I'm not sure if its an act or really how you feel about everything that happened, like it doesn't really matter at this point. It's been so long since ive seen you but i know if i did it would be as if nothing had changed...for me anyway. thats how comfortable you make me feel. Even if I dont see you again or get the oppertunity to apologize for not realizing what we could have been and a lot of other things, my feelings for you wont change. Theres SOOO much you don't know. I just want you to know that youll always be my person. the guy i compare all other guys to. you set the standard high and will always have a little piece of my heart.
*i hope you always remember sunsets, our drives and the way you kissed me because i will never forget. I hope you find this..."
I miss you too. I act "nonchalant" because of what you put me through and my determination never to go down that road again. We belong together though, of this I'm certain. I forgive you and need you back in my life. Now what are we going to do about it?
******
Another one of my favorite sub-genres of the Missed Connections section at craigslist...the passive aggressive, non-confrontational types. These people are insane...they are actually having a dialogue about the state, or non-state I guess, of their dysfunctional relationship on CRAIGSLIST?? They have obviously all watched one too many Tom Hanks/Meg Ryan romantic comedies...I mean if you are so in love with the person maybe you should...i don't know...tell them. Just a crazy thought.
I should not be allowed to come within a 50ft radius of ANY technology while intoxicated - it always ends badly. Last night I was firing off what must have been completely incoherent text messages, writing acerbic craigslist rants, and worst of all I managed to somehow erase the contents of my 80gb MP3 player. Well played, I know. I have a Zune, not an Ipod, and I didn't think it was even possible to delete everything so quickly. Leave it to me. Honestly though, the odds of my actually pressing the right combination of buttons to do this have got to be astronomical! But sure enough, the thing froze up and I did what I thought was the maneuver to reboot it, but instead I got the cryptic message blinking at me "Clearing ALL Content...please wait"...and poof, it was all gone! Luckily, and in what is a very un me-like thing to do, I have most everything backed up on external hard drive...so it's just a matter of transferring everything over.
So I am just posting this a public service announcement...just sleep it off! How much do you think it would cost to have all of my technological gadgets equipped with one of those breathalyzer locks like multiple DUI offenders get built into their car ignitions....so I can't even operate it if my blood/alcohol level is over a certain percentage? I am starting to think that would be money well spent...
You: The three guys playing the synthesizers at Skully's last night. You followed Two Cow Garage, and you were awful. Please, I beseech you...stop making music! I am sorry you dropped out of art school to form your prog-rock band, but it's not working out and you are torturing people with your noise. And I was afraid somebody was going to get trampled to death with the speed at which your music cleared out the bar. Just please stop...before somebody gets hurt.
******
After LOTS of free Whiskey last night I thought it would be a good idea to write my own missed connection. Seriously, their 'set' may have been the longest 45 minutes of my life. I also want to go on record and state that I am quite proud of my spelling considering my blood/alcohol level.
Is there anything in the world more cathartic than a great rock n' roll show? I think not.
Local heroes Two Cow Garage made their triumphant return to Columbus,Ohio last night and rocked every last bit off stress right out of me! Loud guitars and great songs about not getting the girl played in a small bar...yeah, it was pretty much my idea of heaven. Oh, and the free whiskey. Did I mention the free whiskey? It was a Jack Daniels sponsored shindig. Good times, good times.
Missed Connections. Yeah, that's how I feel. I miss our connection. We did have one at one point, I know it. This past year has been only missed connections between us. You asked me last Saturday, "do you really love me?" Why did you ask me that when I know that you despise me? I don't get it. I'm so emotional right now it makes me crazy. I go from missing you to hating you. I either want to run to your arms or am feeling intense anger. You think you're so perfect and everything is my fault! This is not true and you won't ever see that and it infuriates me. You are so obsessed with that stupid website and those losers on it that you won't pull your h--- from your a--- and see the TRUTH.
But, as Anias Nin said: We do not see the things as they are, we see them as we are. I don't know who that is, but I saw that quote.
I made mistakes and you made them, too, by fueling your anger and contempt for me, KNOWING it would destroy our relationship (remember we talked about how contempt will kill a r'ship). You drove me away and you did it on purpose. You pushed me and pushed me and destroyed me with your "venting" and your bullsh-t "i'm the repairman" crap to the point where I hated myself so much I wanted to kill myself. Thanks for that. But I'm not there anymore - because of my own inner strength.
Here I thought I was confused but you are still upset that I'm going on the business trip cause you think I'm going to fool around with someone? Hello we don't live in the same house anymore. You said you would never trust me if I moved out and now you're changing it to you'd not trust me if I went to Canada? Don't you get it yet?? I don't want anyone else. I don't love anyone else.
And I'm sorry, but some of the things on the index cards are just plain crazy. Flirting with RH? By being nice and cordial? Are you insane? Do you not know what flirting is? You actually said that I should look down and not speak to anyone. That I should not ever engage in conversations with men. I was on your motorcycle and some guy tried to flirt and I said a short sentence to blow him off, referencing "my husband" in it and drove off, yet that's not good enough for you. I'm still what, flirting? Get a grip!!!
I never do anything right. No matter what I do, it's wrong. Cleaning the house and doing dishes and laundry and groceries and dinners etc: wrong because I'm trying to "seek your approval." I also bugbombed the house: WHY?!?!!? because you hated the gnats and I wanted you to come home to a clean house. But by doing that, I was..... what did you say I was doing? Seeking your approval???? But in the next breath, we had no more shampoo left so I was planning to leave you. THIS MAKES NO SENSE. You are batsh-t crazy!!!!!
You sacrificed your life by me going to to school and getting my degree and working part-time? 1st: you would've been working anyway. 2nd: when you started the business to help with the bills, you loved it and I would go with you on runs whenever possible. 3rd: I would gladly help you go through school and not hold it over your head like you are with me. 4th: Isn't that what married people do? help each other? Do I not support whatever you want to do? Have I ever moaned or bitched about anything you wanted to buy?
You said we only went on vacations I wanted and with my family. Well this is interesting because I'm the one who realized that and after I said it, I made a decision not to do the next family thing b/c that wasn't fair! You never even noticed! And if you did, you should have said something! You never even mentioned going on any vacation ever! It's not like you said, "let's go here sometime" and I shot it down?? SPEAK UP! But when you would speak up, you started doing this neat trick of saying you wanted something, but not really wanting it to see if I would do what you said you wanted, or what you really wanted in your head. Wow. and you thought I sabotaged the relationship.OH, and if I did what you said you wanted, then it wasn't cause I loved you, it was because I was seeking approval.
You talk trash about me and air all our dirty laundry to your friends, family, and boss. I HAVE no friends. I have DITCHED my family. And because people at work NOTICED that I was depressed (well gee, I was being emotionally, verbally and physically abused and wanting to kill myself. Sorry if they noticed I wasn't chipper) and they actually care about me because they're good people, you think I'm running for attention and help??? HYPOCRITE!!! I bet if you did read this, you'd think I was doing that now. I'm sorry, who is the one who posts obsessively in that forum of whiners and airs everything there and get attn there! NO, I have not been there:but you said that that's all you do now. HAHAH what a hypocrite!!!
What have I sacrificed, you asked me. Well let's see, I pretty much offered my body on the alter when you beat me all summer, and my psyche when I let you insult me for hours & hours & hours on end. I threw out all my books that I love, books that have been my best friends and well-loved. I threw out all my music that I love. I threw out all my journals that I've kept my whole life. I threw out all my photographs of everything because you were threatened by pictures from 10 years ago:I have one photo album from when I was 10 years old. But I'm sure if you looked through it, you'd find problems there, too.
You said on Saturday, "you want to be with me, but you don't love me." You still think that I want to be with someone like you, but not you. Let me tell you the truth: when I think of the man I fell in love with, the man that I would be in happy tears over - yes I love him and want to be with him. But the you from this past year scares the hell out of me. I don't even recognize you. You've let this monster in you take over and you've got to fight it. But I can't do it for you.
You said that you would have killed me if you could get away with it.
You said that American women are out of control because their husbands can't stone them and there are no "consequences."
Yeah, you've lost your godd-mn mind. That's not the man I fell in love with. Let me know if he ever returns. I miss him so much.
CR will never read this. But I got a little (teeny tiny) bit off my chest. Thanks to whoever spent time reading this.
Love, KR
******
I especially loved the line: "You said that American women are out of control because their husbands can't stone them and there are no 'consequences'"....it just speaks to my inner romantic.
In all sincerity, I would like to thank the lady who posted this. Thank her for the fascinating look into what has to be the world's most disastarous marriage.Ever. And speaking of thanks, I appreciate anyone who cleared the two hours out of their day that it took to read this tome of a craigslist post. It deserves two songs.
Axl Rose is SO rock n roll that he is releasing his new mythical album on a Sunday...and only through Best Buy! I say mythical because for the love of GOD, he has been threatening to release this record since like 2000. It was like an urban legend...a running joke: "Yeah, THIS Tuesday is the day Chinese Democracy comes out...really."
If we could somehow harness the energy that Axl spends thinking about his own importance...there would be no energy crisis, I have no doubt. I will listen to the record, I have to admit I am curious....but I am also rooting against it. I think guys like Axl are the genesis behind things like labels naming themselves 'Kill Rock Stars.' Man, I can't even bring myself to post an actual G n' R song...but I do love this Luna cover...enjoy.
OK, I am going to totally show my age here...but I am getting old, and I am at peace with it. But I digress. Does anyone else out here remember 'sniglets'? If not, congratulations...you are much, much younger than me!(feel free to click the link there, it will give you a brief stufy in ancient pop culture history).
Living in this insane age of on-demand information as we do, I think what the world needs now is a new Rich Hall. I am constantly coming across situations that call for a word, but alas, no word exists. Take the walk I was on last night as an example. And this is one that happens to me ALL THE TIME. I was walking along the side of a street when a funeral procession was rolling down the road, and just as the current song on my mp3 player ended, the shuffle brought up 'The Funeral' by Band Of Horses next...as the procession was RIGHT THERE. I have these amazing musical coincidences happen all the time,and I can't be alone. I mean most of my music obsessed friends are just like me and ALWAYS have their Ipod's in their ear. This has to happen to everyone sometimes.
And this phenomenon needs a word. I would like to nominate: Ipodepity - The fateful meshing of life and the shuffle mode.
Or how about when your Ipod plays two oddly related songs back to back. Like just today my shuffle played Lykke Li's 'Dance Dance Dance' and T Rex's 'Cosmic Dancer' back to back...again, this sort of thing NEEDS to be called something. I have literally tapped out all of my excess brain power in coining "ipodepity"...so feel free to share your suggestions on this one, or any other Ipod related circumstances that deserve their very own definitions.
One of my absolute joys in life is the simple act of taking a walk. I love grabbing my mp3 player, turning it on shuffle, and then just take off walking. It is so great to get lost in my own head for a bit, all the while rocking out to a great soundtrack.
And a killer side effect of this love of mine is that every time I do take a walk I stumble across a handful of awesome songs that I had totally forgotten about. Luckily for me, I am in horrible shape - so I get totally winded before too long, allowing me to remember the tunes that made me smile with sentimental glee. And now, the miracle of blogging...I will share last nights gems with you:
God what a great rock album Gish is...and did it REALLY come out in 1991?? Man the years are falling off like leaves...
Why's 'Alopecia' record is easily one of the coolest albums of the year...but this is a track I hadn't paid much attention to. I have this really bad habit of getting stuck on certain songs on albums I love...my resolution for 2009 is to work on this.
Long live Ted Leo. Really. Does anyone right better, more infectious power pop songs than he does? This one is from last year's brilliant 'Living With The Living.'
Tulsa reminds me so much of Nada Surf, in the best kinda way. That's another one where I sort of obsessed over one track and lost the other album songs in the process, so I was quite grateful when 'Shaker' popped up via the shuffle.
You're a professional businesswoman in charge of a department at work, or a group of employees. Some of the employees are male. Aren't there times where you'd like to take it out on these guys? Make them wash your car or mow your lawn? After all, you're in charge at work and have underlings to do the mundane tasks; why not extend that to your personal life?
I placed a personals ad recently on Yahoo looking for a dominant woman. The ad read. "Don't Want Sex, But I Do Want to Wash Your Car". Got alot of responses, but noone serious. Maybe I was looking in the wrong lace.
I too am a professional male, type A at work, but in my off-time, Id like to find a female that is looking for a more submissive male to serve her wishes. Maybe it's time you went shopping! Wouldnt it be nice to have a man carry your bags without bitching while you shop in leisure? Or maybe you love flowers, but hate the physical task of putting in a flower bed? Thats where I come in?
Skys the limit...only to your imagination!
I'll say it here too...I Dont Want Sex, I Just Want to Wash Your Car"
I knew I was going to love this new album, 'Silence Is Wild' from Frida Hyvonen after about 90 seconds into the opening track, 'Dirty Dancing'...yeah, I was totally hooked. I love her conversational, sentimental lyrics. She reminds me of a female Jens Lekman - and coming from me that is super high praise!
Here is the track that started my love affair...enjoy!
There is so much soul packed into the 45 minutes that make up Beth Rowley's 'Little Dreamer' CD. She has the kind of voice that just makes guys melt...at least this guy...beautiful rainy day music. Here is a tune for you, hope it's raining wherever you are...
I'm looking for a LTR with a woman, that can take me as I am. I love rock n roll and my long hair. All my family tells me to cut my hair, and maybe, I'll find a nice woman lol!. I come from big family, my dad is a pharmacist and two brothers that our attorneys and four sisters. I guess you can call me that black sheep of the family. I'm a very kind hearted man. I love and family and friends, and would do anything for them. My mother died last year, and now I moved in with my father to help take of him, and things around the house. I love to go rock concerts, like to hunt. My buddy has a sweet place in Hocking Hills, we go to hunt, camp, relax and enjoy life. I have been at the same job for 18 years, at a factory in Columbus. I'm looking for a nice woman, 35 to 45 years old,kids o.k.,that likes rock n roll, party, likes to have fun, family oriented, employed, takes care of her self and no pill poppers! I have no kids, never been married, only been in a couple relationships my whole life. Life is to short, looking to settle down with a nice woman, and spoil them to death. Are you out thier? Please send pic, love to see who, I'm talking to. Hope to hear from you. P.S. Big time buckeye fan! O-H-I-O !!!!!! Rick
******
I just love that he includes: "Woo!Hoo! VanHalen" in his personal ad title...I am really, REALLY rooting for this guy!!
It dawned on me yesterday as I was posting on the new Blue Giant(which includes husband and wife founders of Viva Voce, Kevin and Anita Robinson) that I have never - or if I have it's been ages ago - posted a Viva Voce song. And that is a crime.
I saw VV open up for Silversun Pickups in 2006 I think, and have been a huge fan ever since. They make such a beautiful amount of noise for a two piece band...I was blown away! This tune I am posting is available on their EP, 'Viva Voce Loves You.'
This is installment of my great unrequited loves of rock women is courtesy of Canadian singer/songwriter Kathleen Edwards. Anyone who has ever stumbled across this blog and read even a few posts has probably figured out that I am a sucker for:
1) girls with guitars 2) alt-country 3) girls with accents(yes, even Canadian accents)
Kathleen has all of these traits and so many more...but the restraining order says I can't go into much detail, so I will just share a few songs of hers that I love!
Are you in a band that you want out of but you don't want to hurt anyone's feelings?
Is your band going nowhere and you're tired of playing in a basement?
Do you have a band that's on the verge of making it big, but you don't have enough "Behind the Music Moments?"
Then you need to contact me. I have the ability to cause any band to implode. I don't know how I do it, I just know that it works. I play guitar. I'm a nice enough guy and have never been in a situation with a band where I've raised my voice. I don't try to run things, you don't have to play my songs...but rest assured, once I'm on board, people will start dropping out. It might be the bass player moving to another state. Then the replacement guy won't gel with the drummer, so he'll quit and then, man, the lead singer's just not feeling it and the band will dissolve. It's a knack. A talent. And I don't even need to join your band...I once auditioned for a band and not only didn't get the gig, but got the other guitarist fired.
So if you have a band and you think you're tight enough to bring me on board, then shoot me an e-mail. My influences range from punk to country.
'Carry The Weight' is the latest record from Philadelphia singer/songwriter Denison Witmer. It's a beautiful tip of the proverbial cap to those great singer/songwriter records of the 1970's...think along the lines of Jackson Browne, James Taylor, or Carole King.
Here is one from the album that I love, how you dig it.
Wisconsin's best Brit-pop band, Pale Young Gentlemen, are back with 'Black Forest(Tra La La)', a brand new studio album. It's most definitely a keeper. I just love the strings throughout the album.
Blue Giant are a country-leaning rock side project from some of the best musicians in the Pacific Northwest - Kevin and Anita Robinson from Viva Voce and Chris Funk from the Decemberists, among others.
I hope this 6 song EP, 'Target Heart' is just the first in a line of future releases and not just a one off outing...I am loving it!
I was pretty much hooked on this sophomore album from Swedish band Love Is All right from the very beginning. I just love the screeching vocals of Josephine Olausson.
Here is what, for today anyway, is my favorite track off of the new record, called "A Hundred Things Keep Me Up Night." Love Is All - 'Give It Back' MP3
I love you. I do...but the fact that you are missing more than a few brain cells still never fails to shock me. I didn't think it would really be a problem that you could be so dumb, but you know - I really miss having intellectual conversations. The only ones I have anymore are with my friends (who all laugh at you behind your back) or strangers. (Who also all laugh at you behind your back.) My Mother thinks you are mentally disabled...or, to put it more rudely - she used the big R word. I know you try and I know your parents did a shitty job raising you - but for crying out loud, you went to school (I don't know HOW you managed to graduate, but you did)so you really should know these very simple, basic things. Latest case in point: When we were watching tv the other night & there was a quick glimpse of Queen Elizabeth, along with some narration. You said - "The QUEEN?" And when I said - Yea, the Queen of England. The old bag, she's been around forever...you actually said "I didn't know England had a queen."
Try as though I might, I just can't seem to will that clock on the wall to move any faster. And I assure you, it's not from a lack of staring. I could not have been less productive.
Still a couple of hours left in the day, and the only way I am going to be able to power through it is with a small injection of ROCK directly into my head...so here a few old school jams(wow, I am totally showing my age with this song selection) that never cease to make me happy...down with Mondays, up with music!
Hey If you are needing A hotel room I have one for free.No need to be outcalling or stranded. This is legit don't want the room to go to waste. e-mail me. send a picture if possible.
******
What a good samaritan, willing to help any woman in need...as long as she has an 8 X 10 glossy photo that meets his very high standards. Sound the serial killer rapist alert...
My friend Henry Toft has released his second EP, 'Home And Other Places I'd Like To Visit'...and it is so, so good. I just wanted to pass along my favorite track off of the record...if you like what you hear, you can pick it up on Itunes now...thanks as always for listening! Me And The Horse I Rode In On - 'Girls Who Make Mixtapes' MP3
I passed this story a long to a friend via email this morning, and I thought I'd just paste it up on the blog - it is just that wonderfully random! It also goes to show that even though Ohio was a blue state this year, there are still lots and lots of crazy red people here.
i need to tell you about my Target experience. I was there picking up my brother's buffet of meds at the pharmacy, and the lady in front of me was making the biggest scene. Apparently the line was too long at the service desk and her complaint was an emergency so she ran immediately to the Pharmacy for help. Her issue? She has two of these creepy talking baby dolls in her hands, and she swears...and she is DEAD serious, that they are saying "Islam is life"! Really. She made the poor pharmacist, and me by default, listen to it like five times...i don't know what it was supposed to be saying, but by the fifth time it almost kinda/sorta, vaguely sounded like "Islam Is life"..if that is what you WANTED to hear. God...she was demanding that all of these be pulled from shelves. They finally hustled her away to a conversation with multiple members of Target management. I am kind of disappointed that I didn't see the outcome of this, but also glad she was far, far away from me.
Like I told me friend, it actually gave me a nice dose of perspective. No matter HOW bad I think my life is, at least I am not her! Can you imagine going around looking for stuff like this to complain about?? I never cease being amazed at people's idiocy...
This song is a beauty from the new Lambchop record, entitled 'OH(Ohio)' - in honor of our great state's botching of the 2004 presidential election. Sorry America, we did better this year.
HI MY NAME IS JOHN I AM 5'11" 195 BROWN HAIR BLUE EYES I AM HONEST LOYAL HARD WORKING WITH A GOOD JOB NOT AFRAID TO GET MY HANDS DIRTY GOOD HEAD ON MY SHOULDERS I HAVE A BIG HEART A LOT TO GIVE I HAVE A VARY NICE HOUSE MY OWN CAR AND TRUCKS I LIKE TO RIDE ATV'S AN DIRT BIKES I LIKE FAST CARS GOING TO CAR SHOWS GOING TO FLEA MARKETS I LIKE TO TRAVEL GOING TO THE PARK GOING HIKING I LIKE TO STAY AT HOME AND WATCH MOVIES AN CUDDLING ON THE COUCH I HAVE NO DRAMA NO KIDS NO EX AROUND DONT SMOKE WOULD LIKE TO MEET THAT SPECIAL PERSON TO BE VARY GOOD TOO DONT BE SHY DROP ME A LINE
It's been a really, REALLY, long day on this end....so I just wanted to leave you with one last new classic....from my hero, Glen Hansard...enjoy and have a great rest of your weekend!!
I hate hospitals. I know, they aren't anyone's preferred destination, but I really, really hate them. Couple my long held mistrust of the medical establishment with my general disapproval of authority and then add the sterile, blinding whiteness of hospital decor, and there you have my own personal hell. But with my brother having his biopsy this weekend, I have had to spend an inordinate amount of time in a hospital room for the last couple of days. It's been eye opening. See, I have never stayed the night in the hospital as a patient. In fact I have never even had to go to the hospital, which is amazing considering my incredible lack of balance and my overall clumsiness. The rooms are even sadder than I imagined.
My brother had a 'roommate'...who deserves to have a screenplay written about his life - this I am proclaiming after a brief 60 second exchange with him. The first time I was in their room, a nurse was admonishing this guy for sneaking out of his room this morning and going to the Waffle House! If you have never been to Columbus, Ohio...the fact that a cancer patient could escape from his hospital bed and walk to an almost adjacent Waffle House should tell you all you need to know about our fare city. This guy is awesome. So grizzled, so life-tested. When the doctor came in to talk to him, the nurse just pulls a curtain to seperate the room...but you can still hear EVERYTHING. It's a really small room. The doctor proceeds to tell this guy in the most matter of fact way that he has stage four stomach cancer and there probably isn't much they can do for him but to manage the pain. Then he asked him if he had any family that he wanted to call. He didn't. He said it had been 15yrs or so since he had talked to anyone in his family. So, so sad. They talked for a few minutes more, about courses of action and what not. The sad affair came to and end when the doctor pulled back the curtain and excused himself...so it was just me and my brother and this stranger who just learned he was dying in the room...probably the longest 4 seconds of my life. We were this guy's family for all practical purposes...he looked at us and said "Enjoy your youth boys, enjoy your youth"....then he shuffled outside to smoke a cigarette - illegally of course.
My brother got discharged(is that the right word? Somebody get's discharged from the army, but the hospital? Maybe?) about an hour later...I still don't like hospitals, but I think I like humanity just a little bit better. Cold War Kids - 'Hospital Beds' MP3
To the redhead in the '95 Buick: you had gone to put your cart away and I ran your dog over. It's hard to see over those motorized carts and your terrier was so small. I put in a shoebox on your hood. I hope you forgive me. I really do.
******
After the election Tuesday I was feeling so good about our country again, ya know? Like we as a people were FINALLY making strides towards becoming a better society. And then I clicked on the Craigslist missed connections pages and snapped out of it.Instantly. You ran her dog over in the Wal Mart parking lot and are apologizing via Craigslist?? At least you had the decency to put the remains in a shoebox and leave it on her hood though....classy move.
Honestly, this is one of the most beautiful love songs I have ever heard. I don't know what else to write....just listen...and smile. Actually, I will say one more thing...next time you are out, but this new Herman Dune album, 'Next Year In Zion'....it's golden.
If you couldn't tell by the randomness and the brevity of the posts here, this blog is an invention of me hating my job and making every effort to waste as much company time and as many company resources as possible. With that said, I just had to interact with maybe the least friendly person on the planet....he was French. Are those stereotypes about French folks true? Are they really that rude? Having never been to Europe I thought it was an American urban legend, and I am surely not going to convict the entire country on this guy's lack of civil decency...but man, he was so not cool. So as I am forever thinking in song lyrics, this song just popped into my head, thought I'd share it.
See how easy that was...another 10 minutes killed...is it Saturday yet?
This new album from Australian band The Panics, is so good that I am going to forgive the good folks down under for unleashing Wolfmother on us a few years ago. I kid, I kid. Seriously though, great rock record here...
I really need to do an extreme blog makeover...my little corner of cyber space is kind of sad looking. Can anyone point me in the right direction for cool blog layouts? Keep in mind, I am severly tech-challenged...really. Cutting and pasting is about the extent of what I can do...
I just picked up the debut record 'Momentum' from Connecticut singer/songwriter Lissa Piccirillo and it is just lovely. She is so talented...reminds me a lot of a young Patty Griffin. I just wanted to pass along one of my favorite tunes from the album...a song about settling.
...or my email is anyway! Hey, it's me Blair...the Certain Songs staff of one. I just do this for the love of the music and am in no way trying to rip anybody off, so if you are an artist or a record label and you are not happy that I am promoting your music, or you want me to take a song down, just shoot me an email and I will most definitely oblige.
And please support the artists I post here in whatever way you can if you do download a song...go to a show, buy some merch, buy an album...these songs are the soundtrack to my life and I just love to share them. But I can only do that if the insanely talented artist responsible for said songs are able to eat.
I also love hearing new stuff...so any submissions can also be sent to my email, I will try my bestest to listen to everything and get back to you all...peace,love,rock n' roll.
csmusicblog@gmail.com
Monthly Mix Tape
Mission Statement
I guess you're old enough to know. Kids out on the east coast. Roughly twenty years old. Got coaxed out by a certain perfect ratio. Of warm beer to the summer smoke. And the meat loaf to the billy joel. Certain songs they get so scratched into our souls.
She goes low on the seats when she gets high in her car. She looks shallow but shes neck deep in the steamy dreams of the guys along the harbor bars. She's pulling out her shirttails and jacking up her socks. Stern and stoned and confident, coming up towards the jukebox. Born into the only songs that everybody finally sings along. B-1 is for the good girls. It's only the good die young. C-9 is for the making eyes. It's paradise by the dashboard light. D4 is for the lovers. B12 is for the speeders. And the hard drugs are for the bartenders and the kitchen workers and the bartender's friends. And they're playing it again. Ellen Foley gives us hope. Certain songs they get scratched into our souls.
I guess you're old enough to know. Kids out on the west coast are taking off their clothes. Screwing in the surf and going out to shows. They get high and ride around in gtos. I guess you're old enough to know. CERTAIN SONGS THEY GET SCRATCHED INTO OUR SOULS. - The Hold Steady
