Craigslist Musical Dedication

Was Her Mobile Off, Or My # Blocked? - 30 (Columbus, OH)

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Date: 2009-07-10, 3:53AM EDT

I saw this girl on a dating site on July 4th. I thought she was perfect. There were other women that I was intrigued by, but none of them came close to being as perfect. The thing is I actually saw this girl on the site months ago and liked her then, but she deleted her profile. Then she made a new one and we started talking. There are so many things I like about her, and I've only known her for 5 days. I think she is the most beautiful creature ever. I like that she doesn't have kids. She's a dancer (ballet for 10 years), and a art major who wishes she could get her Masters. That is reason enough to like her. But here comes more. She collects quotes and shares them with people. She offered to teach me Spanish and dancing. She likes the History Channel. She thinks she is boring and a bit eccentric. She has minor issues that make her seem human and ordinary (down to earth) like smoking and anxiety, which I'm sure both would go away if she started stopped drinking/smoking and avoided certain situations.

Well, it seems that she can't handle me being an ace some of the time. The first day I sent nude pics of myself, she wrote back and said "awesome"! That made me feel good, because it was like she wasn't making a big deal of it. It's just a penis. It doesn't mean I don't respect her. I sent her some after that, and by the third day she said, "Don't send me your pictures. I don't want them." I thought that was the rudest thing to say. It caused me to recollect all those women who ever decided to be a b!t(h to me. So, I didn't feel kissing up to her. If she wanted to think that I'm this awful human being, then so be it. So I wrote back and said, "no". And she said, you are a jackace, leave me alone. I felt bad, because I know I'm not a jackace and I wanted to prove it. But it was the second time she called me that, the other time supposedly for a misunderstanding. I thought this could be a misunderstanding too, but I wasn't sure. All I know was that she said I came on too strong, and that she was going to delete her dating profile. I started to feel so angry. This is a woman I freaking like, and she has to act like an offended child. So I left her alone after that.

Well, today I was in Wendy's still thinking about how I had totally given up on women; that I hated every one of them because there isn't one brain between the 10 billion of them (or however many there is). Then I thought, hell what's the point of being a nice guy. Let's have some fun. Let's bring the dark side out. It sure beats the hell of being miserable, like I have been for the past 30 years. So, I went into the restroom and sent more pictures of my thing. I wasn't even erect. Then I went outside and she wrote back and said, "I was serious yesterday. Don't send me pics." I didn't care. I took another one of the street, then a tree top, and then a beer can on the sidewalk. She started writing, "You are a jackace. Leave me alone."

Well, here we go with the "poor me" bit again. I was getting tired of it. But I decided to tell her my REAL EMOTIONS. So I told her look, I like you a lot. And I forgot what I was going to say or what I said, because I only had so much room in one text message, and I had to send three text messages to finish my though. She was already writing back after the first one. "If you like me so much, then you will stop sending me pictures. It freezes up my phone." While I am writing, "I just want to do what I feel like, be myself, but still talk to you." Then she calls me a jackace again, until she gets my latest message. I'm thinking, why couldn't she have told me before that it froze up her phone. IT sure beats the hell out of "Dont' send me pics. I don't want them." How can a creature that I want to like and be with so much, not understand the difference in these two types of messages. How one is considerate, and the other one is rude. Hell, I would have been more satisfied with, "PLEASE (magic word) do not send me any more pictures of your thing." Anything.

Well, I write back and say, "I will stop sending you pictures if I can still write you messages, and if you stop complaining so much." She writes back, "Deal." I ask her how work is going and she says terrible and that she needs some sleep. I tell her what I'm doing for the day and I told her I'll text her back later in the night, after she wakes up. I wished her a good night. She said, "ok".

So I wait the entire day and contact her, only to find that my messages won't go through and there is a phone restriction. I'm interpreting that as a block. I wish I was overreacting, but given the history of our correspondence, I tend to believe she wants to "not be bothered" again.

Yeah, I come on too strong? Well she comes off too weak. The human race has accomplished so much since Adam and Eve, and yet I have yet to meet a woman who has any sense and good will about them. She disappoints me, and yet I waited four years on that site to find someone I liked, and she was it. Now, I've given up. No wonder everyone thinks God is male. Women are ignorant, selfish, deceitful creatures. I want to be me, both good and bad, without masquerading anything. The genuine attraction and liking and caring and niceness should have been apparent in me. But his woman is too self absorbed that she can't see anything other than her damn self.

I wish all women were dead. I wish you were dead Erin.


Wow. This was like the 'War And Peace' of Craigslist missed connections! This is also what crazy looks like in text form. This has all happened since July is the 10th. I usually wait til about the 3rd week to send a phone pic of my penis, but I am admittedly old fashioned. You are right man, she has major issues...not you. Single women everywhere...I suddenly feel your pain.

* The Broken Family Band - 'The Girls In This Town' MP3

4 Response to "Craigslist Musical Dedication"

  • a.parker Says:

    And my parents wonder why I am single. Apparently it is because I am a horrible person, by deafault as a female.

  • Blair Says:

    Well, you do the best you can with that one brain you share with your 10 billion sisters ;-)

  • TIM Says:

    stop trying to meet girls online. I'm a guy and i think you are a creep. you never met her and you are texting, emailing, sending naked photos? something wrong with this picture... get some help

  • Angie Says:

    Yes, feel sorry for us please. For having to deal with crazy dicks like this. Pun intended. :)